


Causality

by weazelbeater



Series: Love and War [9]
Category: Kill la Kill
Genre: Angst and Humor, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Attempt at Humor, Bakery, Childhood Memories, Coma, Confessions, Doctor/Patient, Dysfunctional Family, F/F, Flash Forward, Guilt, Hospitalization, Hospitals, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Major Character Injury, Medical Trauma, Music, Near Death Experiences, Permanent Injury, Psychological Trauma, Sad, hardmode
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-07-24 19:04:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7519681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/weazelbeater/pseuds/weazelbeater
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Let me tell you two important pieces of information. One: Recovery can mean 'a return to a normal state of health'. Two: It can also be 'the process of regaining control over something that was lost'.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Causality

 

 

-Five years later-

 

 

“Okay, now…Matoi! Ready for pickup!”

No one came forth to claim the baked goods order. The man at the counter cast his eyes across the sea of waiting patrons. He looked at the slip, leaned over to the girl running the orders and murmured, holding up the slip as he did. With a minute flash of irritation, she squinted at the paper, then squinted over the throng of customers. It was busy and she didn’t have time for this crap, being the only girl who actually bothered to show up for work that day.

She jabbed a painted yellow nail in the direction of a dark haired woman, sitting by herself in the far corner and staring lazily out the window as the throng of commuters rushed by. “Hey…lady! You Matoi?” The woman almost choked on her cappuccino as she realized that she was the target of the bakery inquisition.

“Oh! I’m so sorry. Yes, that is me. Thank you!” She bowed as she took the large bag from the man, who sighed as he handed it over. _‘Mornings are just too much for some people, I guess?’_ he thought to himself wryly as he watched the lovely young woman exit his shop. ‘ _Still, can’t hurt business to have pretty clientele like that be seen picking up my goods, eh?’_ The girl taking the orders kicked his shin gently, as he was now staring dreamily at the woman’s bottom as she entered her vehicle. He turned to see an elderly woman, who was now piercing his shameful hide with a look of severe disapproval.

“Ah, h-hello, Muranaka-sama! It is an honor to see you again in my shop! It has been too long! Why, your order will be free today, just for visiting our humble bakery!” The next twenty minutes would be spent wheedling, groveling and backpedaling in the hopes that Old Lady Muranaka wouldn’t see fit to ask his wife how their marriage was doing, or why he was openly ogling incredibly beautiful young women in his bakery.

Said beautiful young woman was getting into her car, barely overhearing the shop owner splutter to someone of whom he was obviously respectful...if not outright afraid. “Need to stop daydreaming yourself, Matoi Satsuki…you have a hungry family to feed!” she mumbled to herself, hoping that her own daydreams hadn’t made her too late to surprise the slumbering loved ones that now awaited her back home.

“Now, if I could only get used to this surname. Oh well, I have all the time in the world now…don’t I?”

 

 

-Present day-

 

 

_…*beep*…*beep*…*beep*…*beep*…*beep*…*beep*…_

A low, monotonous digital sound, it pricked Satsuki with a tiny, cold heart sting every time she noticed it. It would eventually fade back into the background, as repetitive sounds are wont to do…only to rudely interrupt her thoughts once again, usually when she glimpsed her morose stare being reflected back at her in the shiny steel of hospital equipment.

She glared with intense hatred at the animated green blip, jumping over and over on the small LED screen next to Ryuko’s head, endless arcs representing a strong heart that beat once more. Molten rage simmered under the still mask of her patiently-waiting gaze. _‘Infernal device. You and your promise of health, of strong vitals…yet she cannot wake from this nightmare! Why, you wretched machine?! Tell me WHY?!’_

A new migraine threatened to roil about and start gnashing at the bars of its cage inside her head. Satsuki closed her eyes and quietly started another round of breathing and meditation exercises, in the hopes that it might stave off that beast for a little while longer. It worked about forty percent of the time, she surmised to herself.

After spending an indeterminate amount of time within her imagined Zen garden, she came back to her current whereabouts, miraculously sans headache. She looked about the room and sighed, its irritating _sameness_ wearing thin on her psyche. Hospitals always had a distinct blandness about them, no matter how thoughtful the interior design might have been. This one was no different.

Satsuki had managed, via the magic of extreme wealth, to have Mikisugi be the primary care specialist on hand for this situation. An unusually sizeable donation to the hospital’s budgetary committee earned Lady Kiryuin Satsuki a large donation plaque in the main lobby, and an even larger amount of much-needed discretion.

“…it’s the better part of valor, or so I hear.” Satsuki mumbled to herself, thankful for the medical facility’s blindly-obedient staff. The less people knew regarding Matoi Ryuko’s more…unusual characteristics, the better.

“Ha! ‘Unusual characteristics’. You know anyone around here with _those_ , sweet girl?” Satsuki laughed out loud to herself, imagining Ryuko’s wildly indignant reaction, comprised mainly of tough talk, hissed threats and spluttering. It was better than the reality: Ryuko’s motionless head resting inside a crater of fluffy pillows, oxygen mask nestled over her parched, cracked lips.

Satsuki frowned as she observed the poor state of Ryuko’s lips and skin in general. “- _tsk!_ \- It’s so damned hard to keep you properly hydrated, silly one. Your damned fibers keep fighting the IV needle! Do you know we have to insert a new one several times a day now? Can’t you just… _control_ yourself, if only to make things a bit less difficult for everyone else? Hmm? Please, Ryuko-sama?”

No shouted epithet rose to greet her sardonic statements, and the resounding silence caused yet another painful squeeze of her already-aching heart. Fingers pressed to her chest, Satsuki winced as an errant tear streaked down to plop upon her dark red blouse. Looking down, she growled her annoyance at the obviousness of the wet spot now upon her bosom. She made a note to wear much lighter clothing for the time being, as it would be a bit easier to hide such guilty moisture that way.

“I wore this for you, you know. It’s not my color, no, not at all. Kiryuin Satsuki doesn’t need any more red staining her own damned self, right? I’ve caused enough red to spill out in my lifetime to make me never want to see the shade ever again. Oh, except for _you_ , of course! You wear it the best, obviously. You make it l-look _good_ , you know that? Red is your color, Ryuko…the color of fire, and stop signs, which you always ignore. Oh, and it is certainly the best sports car color…I know you just love _that_ idea, right? Plus, it’s the color of anger, which suits you as well. Sorry, but it’s true, Ryuko…don’t try to deny it. Ah, but it’s also the color of l-love, too...s-so there’s _that_ , as well. Red is your shade, beautiful one. You own it.”

Reaching into her purse, she withdrew a silver MP3 player. Placing it into a well-worn Bluetooth speaker cradle, she turned it on and pressed play. She left it on random, willing to let fate choose the song once again. ‘ _AC/DC - Girl’s Got Rhythm’_ scrolled by on the amber screen as it started blaring out from the tinny underpowered speakers, and Satsuki groaned to herself. _‘Oh, heaven help me, this… this one sounds like a cat being strangled. Really, I have no clue just what she sees in this horrid, obnoxious music! Still, it is hers, and I will play it for her, regardless of the personal cost! But oh, to hear some nice, quiet Debussy right about now…’ _

Still, she smiled to herself at the dusty, greasy fingerprints etched upon the music player’s surface. She couldn’t bring herself to clean it off, even though her inner neat freak was clamoring to do so. It had been hurriedly swiped from the garage’s work bench, and it was almost natural to see the grime upon its pocked, dented surface.

Rummaging around in her purse once again, she pulled out the remainder of a half-eaten turkey sandwich from lunch and started to nibble on it. The lettuce was wilted and the honey mustard had congealed, but her hunger had finally won out over the afternoon’s recurring bouts of nausea. The nagging pain in her upper midsection reminded her for the hundredth time to ask Mikisugi about how to determine if one might possibly have a stomach ulcer…just out of curiosity. Asking for a _friend_ , of course.

She finished the food, then crumpled the paper wrapper into a ball and proceeded to single-handedly shoot it into the waste receptacle located across the room. Smirking faintly, she pondered over the fact that Matoi Ryuko would have made a comment about her superlative skill, then would immediately be rooting around for some paper of her own to challenge her to a duel, paper balls the chosen weapon for the impromptu match.

A tired chuckle escaped her throat as Satsuki slowly stood to stretch for her impending trip to the bathroom. Aching joints assaulted the room with a fusillade of popping and cracking as she yawned. “Regrettably, the only competition _you_ are winning right now is in the ‘Sleep Olympics’, my beautiful girl. It’s okay to stop that now, all right? You _win_ , absolutely and completely. I hereby declare you, Matoi Ryuko, to be the all-time napping champion! A gold medal will be struck for you, post-haste. I will never be able to catch up to you now, I can’t even nap much these days at all…so you can just… _wake up_ to claim your prize! O-okay, imouto-chan...please?”

 

-Five years later-

 

“Wake up, Ryuko! Breakfast is ready!”

“Nnnmmm…jus’ twenny more minutesszzzz…”

“Oh, come now, my darling sleepyhead. I didn’t get up at what even _I_ consider to be an ungodly hour just to have my culinary plans foiled by your utter laziness!”

“Nnnnmmm…’kay…jus’ ten more minutezzz….”

“Oh, what a terrible shame. Then I’ll just have to toss out these wonderfully warm, fresh lemon cream Danishes. That would be such a waste, these being your most beloved delicacy from your favorite bakery, ‘ _The Cake is a Pie_ ’…?”

“Nnnmmm-whaaat? * _snf_ * Whazzat I smell…? Izzat…* _snff_ * Eh? Lemon cream…Danishes? Am I still dreaming? Those’r always gone by the time I get there? I musta gone mad?”

“Already there, I suspect. But no Ryuko-chan, this is for real. They are yours for the taking, _if_ you can protect them from the most sinister threat to their existence! In fact, I hear her approaching even as we speak! - _gasp_ \- Oh _no_ , she’s here!”

“Ka-san! Wake up, wake uuuup, muffins! All warm! You gotta come see, come see!”

“Oh my! I fear all is lost! Ryuko-chan, if you don’t rally your strength, I cannot hope for the survival of even one single lemon Danish!”

“ _*gasp*_ Lemon thingies? I _love_ them! Can I have one, pleeeease?”

Ryuko finally got up, struggling heroically against the immense gravity of her comfortable bed-nest. Squinting with bleary eyes, she smirked at Satsuki. “Mornin’, sweetie. Now…show me those hot buns of yours I’ve been hearin’ so much about!”

Rolling her eyes sheepishly, Satsuki opened the bag for inspection, whereupon Ryuko peered inside, sighed, then muttered playfully under her morning breath “Oh, yeah…sure. _That’s_ what I meant…”

She reached into the bag, withdrawing a golden example of that morning’s finest baking. As she slowly drew in the delectable pastry’s citrusy scent, her stomach chose that moment to gurgle a persistent grunt for sweet sustenance.

Hovering in front of Ryuko’s mouth for the briefest of moments, it then was surreptitiously placed into the somewhat patiently waiting hands of Matoi Jun instead. Overjoyed at this surprise turn of events, the towheaded youngster squealed as she accepted the honor of ‘first taste’.

“Fank ‘oo!” she burbled between lemony bites. “Of course, ojou-san! But doooooon’t get any crumbs in the bed, though, okay? I get in _lots_ of trouble when I do that!” Ryuko locked eyes with Satsuki as she whispered “ _Thank you for this_.”

Satsuki smiled, then nodded sagely. She was willing to overlook the egregious sin of eating in bed, just this once. The reward was well worth it.

 

-Present day-

 

Satsuki’s lips pursed in quiet sadness as she turned to seek out the closest hospital bathroom: it was time for more medication, and another, more focused individual could have perhaps remembered to have water on hand to easier facilitate this necessity…but not her, not on this evening. The atomic-clock precision of her highly focused mind normally made things such as smartphone calendar reminders for medication unnecessary. In light of recent events, however, it was starting to seem like a good idea.

Shrugging to herself, she distantly realized that her one-sided conversations must sound like utter lunacy to anyone who found themselves within earshot of them. Her purse was casually shrugged over her throbbing shoulder, which took more effort than she would admit to any casual observer. Her right arm had recently been pulling double duty, her left hand being a tender mass of useless wooden deadness. Satsuki grunted and squeezed her aching neck, longing for a strong masseuse and an even stronger mixed drink. It was going to be another long, tortured vigil tonight.

‘ _The weight of being a Kiryuin, these days. Naught but misery…perhaps this is my cross to bear for what I have inflicted upon others. I’ll carry it gladly! But…could not Ryuko have been possibly spared from the fallout of my mistakes?’_ She pushed against the door, cold glass leaving a mausoleum chill in her spine. The quietest of sounds caught Satsuki’s keen hearing just then: that of a squeaking hinge.

 _No_.

A voice.

A voice…that was _not her own_? “What? Was I speaking to myself out loud, just now? Am I now so mad that I can’t even tell? I swear, I’m-” She froze, one wide-open eye trembling over her cramping shoulder at the hospital bed…a bed that was now animated with scant yet blessed evidence of conscious movement.

“…* _cough_ *…sss...Ssssasski…s’tha’…tha’...you…?”

The young brunette whirled around, her skirt forming an impressive pinwheel around her as she hurried back to the bed post-haste. The most beautiful gemstone she could ever possibly imagine awaited her: a single brilliant blue pupil, gear-shaped and bleary, peeking out sleepily from a tumbleweed mass of snarled bedhead.

Her breath hitched painfully in her throat, order being wrested at the last moment from the grip of excitable panic. Satsuki then focused herself and forced out a carefully measured facsimile of an oh-so-casual greeting. “Ah! H-hello, sweetheart! I’m so very _happy_ to see you are awake now! How…how are you feeling, my dearest Ryuko-chan?”

Eyes jerkily tracking left, then right through dark, slitted eyelids, Ryuko surveyed the unfamiliar room. Phlegm rumbling in her throat, she weakly croaked out “…nmmmbleh…* _cough_ *…wh-who…th’ hell _are_ you?”

Satsuki’s face fell, the friendly façade crumbling in an instant of panic as amnesia fears ran serrated swords right through her chest. “Ryuko-san? Y-you don’t…recognize me? R-really?”

“Uh…n-no, Sats…I… _know_ you…* _cough_ *…but I figure someone musta, like, sucked out yer brain and replaced it with some…annoyingly _nice_ person? You ain’t _ever_ this sweet to me! …* _cough_ *…Oi? Th’ fuck’s this, now?” She grasped the oxygen mask and tore it off with one twitchy jerk, nose curling in confused disgust.

Glittering tears of joy flowed freely over the trembling fingers that were now clamped over Satsuki’s mouth. Kiryuin Satsuki did not give a solitary fuck about proper decorum or of even bothering to reflexively reel in her exploding emotions at this point. It took all her willpower to not scream out in elated bliss to the heavens right now, and it was only for the sake of potentially scaring the crap out of poor Matoi Ryuko that she was able to even resist such an outburst at all.

“Ah…you came back to me! My dearest, sweetest angel! Oh, thank the gods! I cannot _possibly_ tell you how this makes me feel, imouto-chan! I…I’ve missed you so very much!” Her hand trembled as she reached out and caressed Ryuko’s forearm, feeling for muscles that writhed once more with blessed, conscious life under pallid, blotchy skin.

“Eh? Angel? Who, me? Pfft! You’ve got the wrong chick, lady. Imma…* _cough_ *… _ew, yuck_ …goin’ straight ta _hell_ and you know it! Tha’s where th’ good music comes from, ya know…” Ryuko took the time to flash her hand out in a weak but firm ‘devil’s horns’ gesture. She rocked her head back and forth in the pillow ever so slightly, bobbing in time to the Metallica that was now issuing forth from the music player.

Satsuki wiped her own tears away, smiling broadly as she sniffled and coughed in an effort to clear her throat of bundled emotions. “Oh, yes. I seem to recall your views on the situation…you said there was _-ah-_ only a ‘Stairway to Heaven’, but a ‘Highway to Hell’, and that said a lot about the human race’s expectations about itself. Did I remember that philosophy lesson correctly?”

Ryuko chuckled and shot a thumbs up at her as she nodded, and Satsuki giggled musically at the notion. “Yeah, s’right…ya know, I haven’t…* _cough_ *…listened to AC/DC in, like, _forever_. I should totally change that…”A glance turned to a stare as Ryuko sized up the odd, creepily jubilant creature before her. _Was_ this her sister? Is this a plot? And where the hell _was_ she anyways?

“Hey, Satsuki? Where the hell _am_ I anyways? Is this a…hospital? What the fuck happened? I can’t remember much past…oh…fff _FUCK_!”

She tore off her wire leads and fingertip-mounted pulse oximeter, scrambling weakly to an upright position as she grasped at Satsuki’s arm. “The…mansion? Th-those guys?! Did that all…really happen? Oh, _SHIT!_ ” Several machines around her bed blinked to life, sending out a cacophony of alarms, beeps and other alerts of impending phantom patient emergency.

“Please, please, calm _down_! We are safe! It’s all over! Please…sit back and relax, and I will inform you of what happened. All right?” Satsuki pleaded to Ryuko, and it was only once another brief complete scan of the surrounding area was complete did she finally lean back and emit a low groan, energy now spent from her sudden movements.

The young REVOCS chief executive officer straightened up, placed one palm down upon her toned thigh, and then steeled herself to recount the painful memories as passively as she could muster. “The assassins have been dealt with appropriately. Some are already being processed for sentencing, others are being deported. The one who attempted to murder you has been…neutralized.”

“Neutralized? Ummm…that’s a pretty soft description for…wait. _Assassins_? I thought they were just corporate-secret-loving kidnappers? Who’d want to have _me_ killed, Sats? I don’t understand?”

Satsuki looked down, smoothing out her blouse for the tenth time in as many minutes. “Matoi, they…they were not there for _you_.” The blankness of her stony expression was a crucial tip off for Ryuko, having now been keenly attuned to her sibling’s subtle quirks and mannerisms for quite some time. There was an unholy maelstrom boiling under that surface, and the urge to freak out was tempered by the recognition of this sudden fragility. Gears turned, connections were made, and Ryuko was walloped by the meaning inherent in that factual confession. This was a result of Satsuki’s sordid past, she was sure of it.

Ryuko regarded her sister’s haggard face. Smiling faintly though it was, it looked tired, beaten...old beyond her years. She sighed, then offered her pithiest, most casual observations: designed to obtain factual information while seeking not to disturb the obviously stressed-out Kiryuin. “Well now. You look like I feel, onee-san! I think I’m gonna recommend a nice, long spa treatment, followed by some heavy-duty...wh- _what happened to your hand_?”

Satsuki shrugged weakly, motioning with her left hand’s cast-encased bulk. “Oh, this? It’s...nothing. I was injured during our unfortunate evening at the mansion. Don’t worry about it.” She was supposed to still be using a sling for her arm, but her shoulder was hurting enough that it was worth it to trade off areas of focused pain for the day. Plus, she didn’t appreciate the looks it evoked when her arm was properly slung: people automatically reacted as though she were a pitifully wounded bird, whispering wellness greetings and hushed sympathy exclamations, opening doors for her unbidden, offering to carry personal items for her... _pathetic_. She was Lady Kiryuin Satsuki, and she could carry her  own damned briefcase.

“Yer so full of shit, Sats. I can see from here that it’s serious. Was it...are there broken bones? Tell me what happened. Please?” The look of unabashed worry coming from her dear sibling was killing her: she was supposed to be tending to Ryuko, not the other way around! Still, Satsuki knew where this was going, and she didn’t want to start a verbal battle over this...she knew that ’Captain Cocky of Stubborn Force Ultra’ wouldn’t drop the subject without a fight, and keeping Ryuko calm was paramount in her mind.

“Look, don’t get upset. It’s just a minor knife wound. I’ve already had surgery to repair the damage. Well okay, two surgeries. The cast will most likely be off this week or perhaps the next. It looks worse than it is, really.”

“Minor? _Two_ surgeries? Really...yep, that sounds _minor_ , fer sure. Can you...are you going to be able to use the hand afterwards? How bad was it, really? You better be honest with me, Kiryuin Satsuki!”

“I don’t think you want me to-“

“Kiryuin, seriously? Don’t make me _get up and come_ _over_ there, ‘cause I will-“

“All right, damn you! Please, stay seated on the bed! I...yes, I was stabbed during combat. The blade essentially sliced my hand in twain. The surgeons initially said that I would lose complete use of the hand, and that it would always hurt. Interestingly enough, I still have movement but the feeling is simply not there: it’s gone, a wooden block left in its place. The surgeons and doctors told me that I wouldn't ever get the movement back but I _would_ get the feeling back. They were one hundred percent wrong and I'm _glad_ they were wrong…because I'd rather be able to move the fucking thing. Who needs feelings, right?”

“Oh man, that musta hurt like hell. Oi, it’s like that fucking splinter I had, only way worse!”

“Eh? Well, it...actually, yes. It was essentially in the same area. Odd, I hadn’t thought of that fact until just now. At least I was able to convince them to perform that accursed carpal tunnel surgery on the wrist at the same time. Two birds with one stone, I suppose. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to properly type again, so I have Inumuta looking into customizing some speech software for my own business dictation purposes. I can’t let this stand in the way of my productivity, I simply cannot. Well anyways, it _is_ healing now, albeit at a much slower rate than you do, of course.”

“Okay, that’s good to hear! Um...well, then. So…ah, I guess I was shot, huh? Pretty badass, right?”

“ ** _No_**. Not ‘badass’, Ryuko. Don’t you dare say that! It was the w-worst thing…the worst thing _ever_.”

“Aw, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to upset you! I take it back, I suck…aw hell. I’m so damned thoughtless sometimes. Hey, uhhh….can I…could I hold your hand? I mean, like, the good one? Wait, oh crap! I mean…um, not that I mean to say that the other one _isn’t_ good! Just that it’s hurt, right? So obviously I shouldn’t be holding  that one, I just wanna-“

“Ryuko-chan. I would be _honored_ to hold your hand. It would do me an immeasurable amount of good right now.”

“Ah, yeah! Of course! Right on…put ‘er there, then.”

Their hands united gently on the bed, and Satsuki could feel several tons of intense pressure ease off her throbbing head as she felt the familiar, rough-but-gentle touch of callouses caress her smooth palm once again. She sniffled a bit, then stubbornly held fast to her calm demeanor even as a faint trace of moisture crowned upon her lower eyelids.

“Ryuko-chan? Could you…squeeze my hand, just a bit? I would appreciate it.”

“Uh…sure. Like this?”

“Yes, just like that. Oh...my. It is so very good to feel you squeeze back. I cannot describe how elated I am right now! I-I’ve been here, waiting for you to come back to me…this has been _-sniff-_ just the h-hardest thing I’ve ever-“

“Hey, shush! I’m here, it’s all good. I am so _very_ sorry for worrying you, Satsuki-sama. I guess this is what I get fer not following your lead, right? I’m a real dummy, not listening to you and stuff as per usual, right? Big Sis knows best, after all!”

“Ha, if only. I’ve felt so lost without you. I have come to realize just how very important you are to me. Ryuko-chan, I thought you were d-dead. I wanted to die, myself, right then and there…and I very nearly did! I was reduced to being such a…a sniveling _coward_. We are both so very lucky to even _be_ here right now...”

“Yeah, so…about that? What exactly _happened_ , now that you mention it? Did you strike that asshole down with great fury and anger, as only the great warrior Kiryuin Satsuki could? Didja take him down with the very same knife he used to hurt ya with? Huh? Eh? I’ll betcha you totally did, right? Fucker didn’t know who he was messing with, that total jerk! You musta been _so_ mad, I’ll bet he didn’t even last a minute tangling with _you_ , right?”

“Ah, well…not exactly. You see…l-look, it’s late now and you just woke up. I don’t want to upset you, talking about such traumatic subjects! So I think it’s time to-“

“Oi! Don’t _do_ that! I wanna know what happened! Is that fuckin’ guy dead or not? You said that he was ‘neutralized’, right? I took that to mean that he wasn’t arrested or deported or whatever, so I figured that he must have been…wait, he…he didn’t escape, did he? Oh shit, is he out there, waiting for us to come back?”

“No! He is…you are _safe_ , all right? I…he…he cannot harm us anymore. I promise you that.”

“Okaaaay, so what are you not telling me here? Something about this is bugging you, big time…I can see it in your eyes! Satsuki, please tell me. _What happened?_ If you won’t tell me, I’ll just beat it outta Mikisugi or whoever else is lurking-”

“ _All right_ , damn it! I’ll…I’ll tell you. Please, _please_ do not get upset by what I have to tell you, Matoi…although the chances of  that are quite slim at this point, I suppose. He is now deceased, yes…he was not felled by my hand, but rather your _own_.”

“…holy shit. _I_ killed him? How the hell did I manage that? I don’t…remember this at all?”

“Do not seek to blame yourself. You weren’t…yourself, Ryuko. Nor can I bear to go into those details right now.”

“Yeah, but-“

“Ryuko. Please do not make me recount those details! I simply…I cannot do this right now! I _will_ go over it later, I swear to you! Just…not now. Not _now_ …”

“O-okay. Understood, boss. Sorry about that.”

Satsuki dabbed moisture away from her eyes for the hundredth time that day with a well-used handkerchief. When she finished, she stuffed it into her purse and turned back to Ryuko, who was now staring vacantly at the ceiling. Finding out that you were somehow responsible for the death of another person was never an easy proposition, and Satsuki could see this reality was now seeping into Ryuko’s unnerved features.

“Ryuko, look. While you were being treated here, I…had to make a decision. I have not acted upon this without considering every angle, and I hope you do not mind too much. The mansion is no longer a safe haven, nor will it be possible for us to override the awful memories of what just happened. Both for myself, and for _you_ , especially. So, bearing that in mind, I have made the decision for us to leave. To move out. The mansion will still serve a purpose, but not as our homestead. We shall find a new place to live together, the both of us. I wanted to have your input in this regard, so I have postponed the signing of any contracts as of yet…I have narrowed it down to a few very lovely spots, and I believe that you will be most excited to see-”

“Ah! Matoi Ryuko! Half undressed and in bed already, and I have only _just_ arrived! I cannot tell you how very… exciting this is for me…!’ Slinking up against the door frame was one Mikisugi Aikurō, former Nudist Beach commander, scientist and shameless flirt. Mikisugi’s sensual purr escaped from pouting lips as his doctor’s coat started to slide off one shoulder. “There needs to be a detailed…examination of your body’s current state, yes? I’m afraid that the time has come to-“

Ryuko noisily ground her teeth, her tender mental state dangerously inflamed by his crass attitude. “I will straight up _kill_ you, sparkle slut. I’ll use a rake. It will be in the newspapers. It will _not_ be pretty.” Satsuki’s patrician fingers drummed slowly upon her crossed arm, evoking to Mikisugi a vision of an unimaginably lethal spider, planning a particularly devious injection of poison and subsequent mummification of a hapless victim. He was oblivious to just how remarkably close this image was to what actually lurked in the young Kiryuin’s mind.  

“Ah, and yet some say that laughter is the best medicine, no?” His gaze flitted back and forth between two very unimpressed faces, perfectly mirroring one another with their fury-bent eyebrows and intense frowns. “W-well…that _may_ have been a placebo, I suppose. How that could have slipped in there is beyond even my keen intuition…?”

He slicked his hair back in one practiced swoop as he wiped off the horny playboy expression and put on his superlative doctor’s business face instead. “Matoi. I am glad to see that you are finally awake! Lady Satsuki has been worried sick about you. You should be more careful in battle!”

“Oh yeah? _You_ should be more careful, or else someone might sneak up on you and-“

Kiryuin Satsuki raised one hand, cutting off Ryuko mid-threat. “Ryuko, please. Calm yourself.” She turned to the suave scientist, who found himself nailed to the spot by the full gravity of her piercing, lethally serious glare. He briefly surmised that one look from _her_ was easily equivalent to an entire salvo of paralytic needles.

“Mikisugi. Do not seek to trifle with me _or_ my sister on this day. Either your bedside manner improves, or your graveside one does. _Choose wisely_.”

A tug on her blouse caused her to swivel back to Ryuko, whose sad-puppy eyes were signaling a keen desire for attention. “Nee-sama, I’m _so_ thirsty…” she whined, and Satsuki squeezed her hand as she rose to fetch a drink. “Very well, Ryuko. Let me get some ice water for you. I could use some as well. Do you want a lemon slice in yours, dear?”

Ryuko squinted at her sister, a flabbergasted look dominating her cute face. “Are you fer real? Who am I, again?” Satsuki laughed, a merry sound echoing in the hallway. “Of course, how silly of me! I shall return shortly, dear heart. Oh, and Mikisugi? _Behave_.”

Heel clicks echoing in the hallway, Ryuko waited until she thought it was safe, and then traded the cute act for a sinister grimace. One crooked finger motioned towards Aikurō, beckoning him to come near.

“All right, ‘Doctor Shiny Jackass, PhDickhead’. Spill. How is she doing? I’d have to guess that I’ve been out for a few days, right?”

“Well, actually…just over three weeks.”

“F-fucking _what_?”

“Matoi, please calm down! This is quite normal, to be in a coma for a period of time after such a violent and traumatic injury!”

“COMA? _How_ traumatic? I think I remember…getting shot or whatever?”

“Ah, yes. That is correct. You were shot in the back.”

“So? I’m chock full of life fibers, yeah? Why would a little ol’ bullet bother me this much? I’ve been stabbed clean through like a thousand damned times by now!”

“Because of that ‘little old bullet’, Ryuko…your aorta was _ruptured_. It was a miracle that you survived _at all_ , life fibers or no.”

“O-oh. Umm…so what? I mean, I’ve had my entire heart yanked out of my chest before, right? No big deal!”

“Whereupon it made its way back into your chest cavity… _intact_. Tell me, Matoi: what happened when Ragyo ruptured her very own heart in front of you? Was it ‘no big deal’ for her?”

“N-no, she…uhhh…pretty much died instantaneously.”

“Well, then. Now you see just how very lucky you are. If that bullet had been just a few millimeters lower? You would be very, very dead right now. It was quite the amazing feat that your fibers were able to weave together and patch the damage long enough for the tissues to heal properly. It certainly took enough blood transfusions to allow this to happen…life fibers become quite thirsty when taxed to the limit, you see. You _can_ actually be killed, you do realize?”

“R-right. O-of course. Yeah, I guess so. So...how is Satsuki, though? She must have been worried sick! And she ain’t looking too good right about now. Have you been taking care of her, as well?”

“Matoi, _no one_ tells Lady Satsuki what to do, not even a doctor. Yes, of  course I have hinted to her that she needs to take care of herself! Perhaps _you_ can convince her of this, because she regards my opinion to be on the level of every other human on Earth, apparently. And by that, I mean ‘hardly at all’.”

“Oi, damn it Sats…what the hell…”

“Look, Matoi. What you need to do is to simply get better! I’m convinced that you two are inextricably linked. What is good for one will nourish the other! She already looks much heartier now that you are awake, I have noticed. This is the key! So follow your doctor’s orders, and get better. I believe you will see her rebound once _you_ do!”

“All right! I’ll do it! I’ll be outta here in no time at all!”

“That’s the spirit! But Matoi…don’t push it! No one has ever medically treated such a life-fiber-enhanced individual such as yourself in this particular manner. We need to be cautious, okay? No crazy stunts!”

“Yeah, yeah. I get it.”

“Excellent! I will return in due time to perform some tests. But for now, I believe I hear your dear sister returning. I will leave you two alone for some quality time.”

“Yeah, th-thanks, Mikisugi-san. I…appreciate your help.”

“But of course! Anything for the girls who saved the entire world! Fare well, Ryuko!”

He slipped out of the room, briefly nodding as he passed the returning Satsuki. She brought in two cups full of ice water, one with a few lemon wedges crammed in for good measure. Ryuko’s eyes lit up as she reached for the heavenly citrus oasis.

“ _Slowly_ , please. No vomiting from you tonight, understood?” Satsuki sternly held the glistening cup just out of reach, firm glare staring down as she waited for a sign of compliance. Ryuko would have sold her soul for that glass right now, so agreeing to these terms was but a simple thing for her.

“Yes, ma’am! I promise...now gimme!” The icy cup was then placed in her grateful hand, whereupon she carefully sipped from it, the delightfully welcome cold water trickling down her annoyingly dry throat. She coughed a bit at first as the water went down, and she made a big show of stopping to take a breath between sips to make sure Satsuki witnessed her adherence to the letter of the beverage law, lest a citrus related embargo be launched by the Kiryuin Water Authority.

“ _*sigh*_ You certainly do love your lemons, don’t you? Why _is_ that, anyway? I’ve never seen anyone eat them whole like you do. Even I could not stand to do that.” Satsuki observed as she watched Ryuko carefully fish out a wedge, then consume it with savory gusto, peel and all.

Ryuko shrugged as she spit a lemon seed out onto the tray next to her, much to Satsuki’s quiet disgust. “Mmmm, yeah… _*ptui*_ that’s some good stuff, right there. Well ya see, Satsuki…when I was a kid, we were always told the importance of vitamin C and stuff in school, and I tried to load up on any citrus-based goodies I could during lunch. Ya know, like a good girl should? Didn’t want to get scurvy, right? Even pirates knew better than that…but those kids were real assholes to me, and they would steal everything off my plate and eat it in front of me before I had a chance. But no one was gonna eat a _lemon_ in front of me to spite my bullied ass, so I just adapted to eating them whole. Plus, it showed them all how tough I was! ‘ _Aw heck, she just ate a lemon... the entire thing? I ain’t gonna mess with her!_’ was all I would hear for a while. So I got used to the bitter taste, and even grew to like it after a while, y’know? Hey, it worked! Well, at least I didn’t get scurvy, anyways…heh heh heh!”

Satsuki just stared at her sister, an unsettling melancholy manifesting itself as knit-together eyebrows and a sad frown. The all-too-familiar phrase ‘ _I got used to the bitter taste..._ ’ roiled about in the recesses of her mind, only it was in her _own_ voice instead, residual echoes of when Satsuki confided her personal tastes in tea to dear Soroi. For two such radically different beings, they had some frighteningly familiar coping mechanisms in place.

She quietly murmured “I’m sorry, imouto-san. I had no idea...” as she gently stroked one of Ryuko’s sheet-covered knees. _‘Oh sure, a quick caress will be all it takes to just melt away all those years of abuse….right, Kiryuin? Ah hell, but what else is there to do? She asked and I told her the truth. Next time, I’ll just say ‘I just really, really like lemons!’ That’ll save her the time of worrying, right now she looks so damned sad...’_ Ryuko mused as she glanced up and spied the frown, the lines in Satsuki’s face, her hollow cheeks and exhausted eyes.

Ryuko pushed her own extreme fatigue and discomfort aside to craft and present a beguiling smirk of casualness. “Aw, heck. Enough about me, sitting here all ‘wah-wah-wah, life was so tough’, right? Are _you_ all right? How’s work? Weren’t there some big deal court cases or something coming up soon? How did that all turn out?”

At this, Satsuki’s eyes darted to look out the window, intently occupying herself with some imagined event or other suitable distraction. Being nighttime, there wasn’t much visible from this angle, but it was better than looking Ryuko in the eye for the time being. She didn’t have the heart to go into the details of how poorly the legal battles were going.

“Oh, everything is fine, considering. Hōōmaru Rei has been covering for me for the most part. Ragyo trained her to do far more than I had originally surmised, at least as far as corporate slave work is concerned, that is. She has quite a talent for it.”

“Do you trust her with that? I mean, she tried to kill you once.”

“I do. Hōōmaru has had a rather profound change of heart. She now wants to be on the side that creates a better world, so no one else will have to endure suffering like she did as a child. The error of her ways has been keenly observed and duly noted by yours truly. She is quite sorry that she came to assist the very kind of monster that once caused war and strife to consume her own village, many years ago. She labored under the illusion that Ragyo was to be the savior of mankind and worshipped her as such. But now… _now_ she wishes to atone for her past sins. In this goal, we are united.”

She looked down at that moment, and Ryuko could almost see the weight of Kiryuin Satsuki’s duty physically manifest as signs of tremendous stress rippled within her sagging form. She could just barely make out the jagged bolt of scar tissue that streaked across her elder sibling’s neck, the white standing out in clear relief from her already-pale skin. Satsuki’s index finger had been absentmindedly tracing this slice, playing the moment she received it over and over in her head while she pondered how the woman who once tried to execute her was now faithfully fighting a daring legal battle in her stead.

“Rei fights for me. Even now, to save the future of the corporation that I wish to utilize for good. I have plans, Ryuko. Plans for creating a better world…and I’ll be _damned_ if I let the petty tyrants of the world have their way with it!”

“I see. And if you end up dying from all that stress? What then, Kiryuin Satsuki?”

“Then I will have at least tried to absolve myself of my terrible crimes against humanity.”

“Karōshi is a real thing, ya know.”

“It’s not that at all! I have a duty to set things right! The Kiryuin legacy…the scales must be balanced! My discomfort matters not in the grand scheme of things!”

Ryuko shrugged nonchalantly. It wasn’t like her to loosen her fangs while embedded this deeply in a conversation, yet she did so willingly...if only to strike from a better angle. She gazed out the dark window, her expression mirror-calm as the frigid North Atlantic on the night of the Titanic disaster.

“Yeah, sure…all right. God, I am so tired right now. I’ve been basically sleeping for almost a month, and I feel like I haven’t gotten a wink? Weird. Well, anyways. Oh…hey, Satsuki-sama? I was wondering something. Would it bother you at all if I told you I was thinking of killing myself?”

Kiryuin Satsuki froze, a painful icepick of paralysis skewering her tender heart. “Wh-wh- _what_? Y-you cannot be serious? Ryuko-chan…that would cripple me! No, utterly  destroy me, as well as all of those who love you! We all love you so very much, surely you know this? I cannot allow you to think in this manner, we _need_ you! You may not realize it, but you, Matoi Ryuko, are a healing force of beautiful cheer to all who have come to know you! Whatever is distressing you, I promise that we can work it out! Please, Ryuko… _please_ believe me!”

Ryuko slowly dragged her eyes from the window to Satsuki’s overly worried face. She locked a serious expression to Satsuki’s own as her observations were carefully laid forth. The tidal forces of her wisdom would either break them apart or compel a cohesive bond…but she couldn’t let things go as they were currently headed.

“Every single thing you just said of me is true of you, as well. _We_ all love you, and we’ll all be destroyed by your own ruin! If you overwork yourself to the point of it being basically suicide, you will succeed in killing _me_ , too. Who exactly are you trying to build a new world for, hmm? Can’t we live in it too, you and me? Satsuki, you gotta balance your need for atonement with an appreciation of your own damned life!”

Satsuki frowned deeply. She didn’t appreciate stumbling into this verbal trap so easily...or that an utterly exhausted, bedridden girl was outflanking her in this emotional match so succinctly. “That is _not_ a fair assessment of the situation at hand, Matoi. Furthermore, I don’t appreciate-”

“No, it’s not fair…is it? _Fuck_ being fair! Think of what your actions do to others for once, damn you! You want to set things right, Kiryuin? Then start  here, right _now_. Care about _yourself_ , Kiryuin Satsuki...you _need_ to start doing this! How can I possibly hope to heal if you’re not going to be there to help me, huh? Oh, and if you’re gonna start spewing some bullshit about ‘not deserving it’ or ‘being unworthy of caring’ or whatever, then I’ll follow you right down that path, that example you lead. If there’s truly no hope for you, then the same goes for _me_. Get it? We are in this… _together_.”

Satsuki’s head dropped precipitously, gravity finding less resistance within her proud neck due to the sudden weight of shame. She breathed in a long, steady rush of air, and found it to be suddenly stifling in that room. Perhaps…Ryuko had a point? Was it possible to see a way past her personal specter of eternal self-disappointment, the nigh-impossible pursuit of perfection? Much like a blade that was honed so sharply it shattered, she could also be overly unforgiving and hard on her own self…the years of pursuing this mindset were starting to wear upon her psyche. But how, then, to determine the proper course of action? The stakes are so very high, even now…mistakes would be unacceptable and shameful! And yet…isn’t that how she felt right now?

Ryuko reached out and caressed the tightly-wound fist of her sibling. “I’ll help you with this, Sats. I swear. Will you help me, too? Please?”

Satsuki’s lip trembled as she whispered her offering. “I can only promise to…try. I know of no other way to live.”

“That’s a start! We can build on that promise. Someday, you’ll learn to see the woman I see in you, the beautiful champion that everyone sees in you. This I promise to you, Lady Kiryuin Satsuki!” Matoi Ryuko beamed an encouraging smile of hopefulness towards her sibling. Satsuki, who found her cheeks flushing at the sight of the girl’s infectious spunkiness, allowed a faint smirk to ripple over her own lips.

“You’re really something else, Matoi Ryuko…you’re the one who’s supposed to be healing here, not me! I knew you were special the moment I saw you on the steps of Honnōji Academy. I just had no idea you could be this…charming. Your tongue is cast in the purest of silver, this I swear!”

Ryuko’s cheeks flushed with pink, and she struggled mightily with the urge to sexualize the ‘tongue’ comment, but now was not the time. Instead, she pursed her lips in quiet shyness and cocked her head to one side.

“Satsuki-sama. May I ask a favor of you? I would like to sit next to the window. Can you please help me move over there so that I may sit in that chair? I would greatly appreciate it.”

Ryuko’s request was unusually formal and polite, the carefully chosen speech eliciting a pair of curious eyebrows to rise up. “Why, of course I’ll help you, dear. Are you sure you’re feeling up to it? You must be exhausted…?” Satsuki leaned over to embrace Ryuko as she slowly moved forward, testing her stiff joints and cramped back as her younger sibling swung her legs over the bed’s edge.

“I can sleep when I’m dead. Right now I need to do this thing I do when I get…what?”

“Ryuko, could you not say such things? I know you don’t mean anything by it, but-“

“Yeah, sorry. Damn, I just _knew_ the moment those words left my lips, it was poor phrasing. I’m very sorry, Satsuki-sama…please accept my apology.”

“Of course I do. My goodness, I must say that your diction was flawless. From hence does this proper decorum originate, if you don’t mind my asking?”

“Aw heck, I figured it would convince you to let me sneak over to the window for a bit. I could just see you scolding me fer even gettin’ outta bed at all. So, maybe I…buttered you up a bit? See that, I _can_ totally speak with absolutely proper speech when I want to!”

“Hmm. Well, apparently it worked. Your guile is duly noted, you sly fox!”

Ryuko shrugged, smirking as she did. “Pfft, oh, please… _you_ are the real ‘fox’ around here, babe!” She chuckled as she settled down in the chair next to the window. Ryuko always adored the tiny window in time between her flirty compliments and Satsuki’s automatic ‘serious face’ recovery: in between was the loveliest sight she ever could hope to catch…that of honest blushing and genuinely surprised shyness. It melted her heart every time, to see her ultra-stuffy sibling reacting in such an adorable manner, even if the moment was brief and fleeting.

Ryuko placed one palm against the cold glass, the warmth from her hand causing a glow of heated fogginess to outline her fingers in pale relief. She cast her eyes down upon the hospital’s parking lot and the surrounding city, admiring the endless twinkle of lights while she gathered her turbulent thoughts before she spoke.

“Windows…they hold a lot of meaning for me, Satsuki. Always have. Ever since I was little, I’ve always spent time looking through them, just waiting for better times to come around, ya know? At first I was only waiting at the window for Dad to come pick me up from boarding school, but he never came to get me. I spend about a decade or so waiting for that to happen, but that man would _never_ take the time from his work to make the journey to pick me up in person. The few times I was allowed to return home for the holidays early on, he would just…send me money and have me take the train all by myself. I was so scared, doing that! I watched the other kids get picked up by their parents all the time…I always thought to myself ‘ _When is it ever gonna be my turn?_’ Maybe I was always looking for _someone_ to show up and rescue me, so windows ended up representing some kind of hope, I guess? Like…whatever was on the other side of the window held the promise of a better situation than what I was experiencing, I suppose. The grass is always greener, right?”

Ryuko ran her fingertip through the fogged handprint image left on the glass, absentmindedly drawing lines through the ghostly fingers one at a time. She sighed listlessly, then rested her chin upon the arm which was resting on the windowsill, wistful melancholy tiring her more than her bedridden-related fatigue ever could.

“You know what’s funny, Sats? One of my earliest memories is from when Dad changed from being the ‘caring younger dad’ to the ‘old bitter jerk’ that I ended up knowing most of my life. I honestly thought that people just…transformed immediately into old age because of that: from cool guy ‘Kiryūin Sōichirō’ to jerk-ass ‘Matoi Isshin’, although I was too young to know about his real name. He was just ‘Daddy’ to me…not that my confusion ever registered as being important to _him_ , mind you. He was all like _‘Yes, Daddy looks different now, so just deal with it, Ryuko! Now stay still so I can jam this needle in your arm again!’ _Isn’t that funny? That I thought people just went _-poof-_ and they were old? Joke’s on _me_ , I guess…at least, it always felt that way.”

Satsuki gingerly sat upon the chair’s armrest, her hand seeking out Ryuko’s shoulder in an act of soothing comfort. She squeezed gently, and Ryuko’s hand reached back and flopped down upon it to return the gesture. She shrugged weakly, as if to say _‘Hey, what can ya do, right?’_

“Dad just sent me money, along with his written excuses. That was his way of saying ‘sorry’ for every time he disappointed me…and he did that a _lot_ , believe me. For a while, I just spent it on my friends…well, okay. The kids that would hang around me because I gave them money and bought them candy and crap. Bribery, really. Rented ‘friends’ are all I really had back then, I guess. But the more neglected I felt and the more kids teased me about having no real family, the more fights I got into at school. So Dad would retaliate by docking my allowance. So…less money, less ‘friends’. Eventually, I couldn’t even bribe anyone to hang out with me…I was branded as tainted goods to everyone, the ‘anger management’ kid who transfers schools every damned year. I was so hurt, so fucking angry…I’ve had a real anger problem ever since. I guess _that’s_ a big surprise, right? Good ol’ ‘ _Impulse Drive Matoi_ ’, the short-fused delinquent punk from hell!”

She felt the hand upon her shoulder squeeze just a little a bit harder, followed by a gentle kiss placed upon her head. Satsuki whispered into the tousled rat’s nest of hair upon Ryuko’s head “It wasn’t your fault, dear heart… _any_ of it. I’m so very sorry for what you have had to endure. I myself still find it hard to believe that he was the very same man who I recalled as being a cheerful, loving soul. Why he acted this way later in life is beyond even me.”

Ryuko grunted quietly in agreement, then shrugged. She was too tired to start crying now, so a long drawn-out sigh was sent out in place of her absent tears.

“I was there when Dad died, I felt his spirit leave...and when it did, I think that maybe all my last feelings of ‘family’ might have gone up in flames with him. I mean, did I _ever_ have a family to begin with at all? The more I think of it, the more I get the feeling that I was just a pawn to be used in his revenge scheme, like a living booby trap! But what was I really seeking, when I showed up at Honnōji Academy that day? Revenge for having my father, my last shred of family, ripped away from me? Or was I mad because I had wanted him all to  myself… so I could finally wring an answer from him, once and for all? For all the years that went by, being so lonely and lost…and he did _nothing_ to show me he truly cared? Like the money he sent was somehow going to patch things up, make me feel better, when all I wanted was for him to say ‘ _Ryuko, come home now, I miss you so much_ ’ and not more bullshit excuses like ‘ _Sorry Ryuko, I’m too busy with my research, maybe next year_ ’? God DAMN it all to hell!”

Satsuki had no answers, no soothing words to provide relief from this kind of pain. “I…I cannot speak as to his motivations. I know that he was driven to stop Ragyo at all costs. He apparently felt that it was worth giving up his entire life to research ways to accomplish this. I fact, I think that-“

“Look, Sats…I get it. Dad gave up his own life for revenge. I gave up my own life to find answers. You gave up your own life to find justice. Hell, Ragyo gave up her own life _and_ humanity for power! We need to stop sacrificing all we have, Satsuki! If anything needs to stop being a defining characteristic of the Kiryuin bloodline, it’s _this_!”

“Ryuko-sama, I’m truly sorry for my actions. I continue to allow my personal, selfish motivations to harm you, even now. From the beginning, all of my devious scheming and machinations...I used you like a pawn. I used everyone to my own ends. There simply _must_ have been a better way…”

“Aw, come on. I’ve forgiven you for all that! At least now I know what makes you tick, and I understand why you did the things you did…and _still_ do. I just can’t hold that stuff against you, ya know? Not anymore!”

“I haven’t truly earned your forgiveness, not really. Or anyone’s, for that matter. It will be a long time before I can say with conviction that the scales are balanced.“

“God damn it, Satsuki, fuck your concept of ‘scales’! Fucking hell, I almost forgave _Ragyo_ , why can’t I forgive you? Shit, I actually offered her a chance to come back to Earth at the last minute, you know…both for punishment of her appalling fucking crimes, but also for second chances. I don’t ever want to think that just by having life fibers in your body, it means you don’t have control over your own fate...but Ragyo sure showed me that her fate was in her hands. Literally, even!”

“I don’t know if I would have been as accepting of her return as you. Some things simply cannot _be_ forgiven. I quite probably would have succumbed to the urge to murder her _myself_ , if and when I was confronted by her continued existence. I...I’m _not_ sorry she’s gone, Matoi. Death was too good for the likes of her, but the idea that she truly _is_ gone does bring me a modicum of comfort, however small.”

“I know. I’m really sorry. I hadn’t thought of how it might have affected you, if I had somehow managed bring her back with me that day. I just...I dunno...I didn’t want to let _another_ parent die before me without at least the attempt at salvation, I guess? I know that’s super fucked up, given the circumstances. I _know_ it. But still, if I blindly assume that she did everything she did just because of the life fibers within her, pulling her strings...then what does that say about me? I guess a tiny part of me wanted to believe it _was_ just the fibers that made her evil, and that I could have maybe...brought a sane Mom back for us to  both have? I know that’s, like, the stupidest and most naïve thing I could ever possibly believe, and it’s so damned dumb, like hoping an ice cube would survive inside a volcano! Dammit, I just...I-“

“No, Ryuko-san. That speaks volumes to your character, that you could believe there was still some good left, even in...her. It proves that you are willing to grant people forgiveness...it proves that you truly possess a good soul, down the very core of your being! It’s not life fibers that make people evil, Ryuko. It is ultimately their heart that betrays them. I understand the desire to want a normal family, I truly do. Sometimes I do think of how life would be, if I had grown up with a real mother in my life...like...well, like-”

“Oh, ya mean like Sukuyo-sama?”

“Yes! That woman is...she’s truly amazing! I don’t know _how_ she does what she does; she has had to put up with impossible odds, providing for her family while remaining the most cheerful and kind, l-loving...she...the last time we visited the Mankanshoku household? She actually _hugged_ me. Me! And the craziest thing was that she really meant it. I could feel it, that she truly cared! After all I had done, the cruelty of keeping her family in abject poverty, a-and she can still stand to show genuine affection towards my own self? It’s just...just-”

“The word is ‘incomprehensible’, Sats. It’s a big part of the whole ‘family’ thing, I guess. You forgive people for their evil ways. You have to, or the family crumbles...and I guess that family is the most important thing you can ever have, right?”

“Do you know the first time I truly felt _any_ guilt for what I had done, Ryuko? I first felt it after getting to know Mako’s family. I didn’t think a person could remain pure and good if they were denied the best things in life, the comfort of material goods and such. I was wrong. I know that now. People like Mako-san and Sukuyo-sama, people borne out of crushing poverty who still remain golden examples of how humans should be and act accordingly? How _dare_ I create hell on Earth for those that are, deep down inside, better than I could ever hope to be...?”

“Okay. So…exactly why _did_ you keep everyone so damned poor, anyways?”

“Why? History has shown time and again that hungry people accomplish more than well-fed ones ever could. This is historical fact, as well as a fundamental component to the human condition. I needed a strong, disciplined army to defeat Ragyo, not fat, complacent fools! Such an army could not spring forth from the lap of sheer luxury!”

“Yeah, well…your lieutenants sure lived in some pretty nice digs. I should know, I lived there myself, for a short while.”

“They were rewarded for their hard work, yes…they earned their keep! I didn’t have to question their resolve! They were still _hungry_ , Ryuko…even if their personal needs were met! Look, I know full well of the extent of my personal philosophy’s touch. I need to give back to the world, to make up for my awful past decisions. I am aware of this, I assure you! But I’m scared of paying my penance improperly, injustly…as it was before! It feels like I damage everything I touch in my quest to do the right thing. I can certainly build a virtual prison, but how to build a paradise? I’m so damned ham-handed and selfish in my ways. I even…hell, I even sleep with my own s-sister! Damn me to hell, _I’m_ a living example of Ragyo’s corrupting touch…an utter abomination!”

Ryuko flinched painfully, as though scalded by the heated outburst. A remorseful expression flooded her features as she prepared to brave these treacherous waters. “She…she touched me _,_ too. What does that make _me,_ I wonder? Look, Satsuki…have you ever needed to tell someone something that might make them both happy _and_ sad at the same time? I don’t really see you as my sister, I guess. I mean I totally _do_ , obviously I know that, but…I don’t quite know what that would really feel like, is what I mean? I don’t have any family feelings to speak of, and I ain’t so sure I’d recognize it if it hit me square in the face. ‘Family’…what the hell is _that_ word supposed to mean? You, you’re the hot chick I fell in love with, so I never had an issue with the, y’know…the sex and stuff. Maybe, I dunno, Mako feels like a sister to me, I guess? Like a really close friend, a strong bond? Maybe that’s why it was so weird for us, trying to have sex and failing so very hilariously. I dunno, it was so awkward. Trying to read people properly is so frickin’ hard for me! I always feel like I missed some ‘ _How to Be a Proper Human with Real Emotions and Stuff’_ guide book that everyone else got when they were younger, ya know?”

“Kiryuin Satsuki, you’re the only person I know who could possibly put up with me, who could understand the gravity of being near a monster like me and survive it, too! Fuck, can you imagine me dating? ‘ _Hi, I’m Matoi Ryuko, and I’m an alien hybrid killing machine! I like long walks on the beach, piña coladas and turning into an enraged blood beast. Wanna fuck?_ ’ I mean heck, I let Senketsu into my heart, and he was like a part of my own soul, but that’s because…because he was _made_ for me! My dad had to _make_ me a friend that could put up with my obnoxious ass, imagine that! He accepted my tainted self and loved me anyways, when no one else could ever hope to truly understand me…how fuckin’ twisted all these years of hate have left me…but now _you_ actually love me anyways? No one else is strong enough _or_ brave enough to do that! How you haven’t run away screaming by now is beyond me!”

“Ryuko-chan, you are the most beautiful, loving heart of it all, you are a work of pure art and intensity, _oh Gods above_ , I think it might be a part of why I am attracted to you, that you _are_ my sister. My only sexual contact before you was…was _her_! I h-hated her, Ryuko. I absolutely despised even breathing the same oxygen as her…but m-my body, my damned weak body? It liked the physical contact, and I felt purely sick for enjoying it at all, but…I _crave_ it now, all the same! I feel safe with you…I can’t…t-trust anyone else either, I cannot even imagine that happening! The person you know of as Kiryuin Satsuki is not strong, she’s pitifully weak. By succumbing to this terrible urge to f-fuck my only sibling…I’m so damned evil, I’m ruining your life! You’re the only reason I suspect I might even have a human soul, after all I’ve done…and yet here I am: ruining you with my greedy touch, too! The apple obviously doesn’t f-fall far from the tree, now does it?”

Ryuko stared at her sniffling, trembling sister, trying to find the magic words to make it all better and failing miserably. She suddenly yawned just then, a fearsome cavern full of pointy incisors that was inhabited by a curling pink tongue. The intense emotional pressure was coming to a head, and she was robbed of her staying power almost to the point of unconsciousness.

“Oi, Sats…even your neurosis is overblown. Look, I really need you to understand something here. You are _not_ ruining anything…give me more credit than that, please? God damn it, you saved the world…when are you going to ease up on yourself? Look Satsuki, you really need to get some rest. You…no offense intended here, understand? But seriously, you look like total shit. And that’s coming from _the_ total shit master! I mean, damn. Just look at me over here! So why don’t you go and-“

“I. Am. **_Not_**. Leaving. You.”

“Whoa! I wasn’t asking that you leave. I just want you to get some sleep, that’s all! Catch some winks on that couch over there. We can talk more about this in the morning…”

“Er…couch? I’m afraid there is no couch in this room, Ryuko.”

“Uh, duh, it’s right there, nee-san. Hello? That brown, fuzzy beanbag couch or whatever. In the corner?”

Satsuki followed the extended index finger to the darkened side of the hospital room. Squinting, she finally recognized and then understood the source of their mutual confusion. Chuckling, she then sang out in hushed glee, savoring the coming surprise. “Oh, my dear Ryuko-chan. A couch, you say? I believe you’ll be surprised to find that is but a ‘small’ token of someone’s love and concern for your well-being. Observe. Mind the bright lights, please…”

Satsuki got up and limped over to the light switch, joints groaning and complaining loudly as she did. The other side of the room was thusly illuminated, and the sight managed to flabbergast the normally stoic and bravely verbose Matoi Ryuko into speechless gawping. The other chairs, bureau and sink were completely covered with dozens of flower bouquets, innumerable get-well cards, random gift bags…and a disturbingly large fuzzy teddy bear.

“Buh…whuh…uhhh…?” was all she could utter from her loosely drooping maw. Kiryuin Satsuki chuckled once more, arms crossed in smug satisfaction: drinking deeply from _this_ spectacle was warming her insides in a manner that no medicine or liquor could ever match.

“Yes, Ryuko…it’s true. _This_ many people care about you! That monstrosity in the corner is a gift from Jakuzure Nonon, in case you somehow couldn’t tell. Its name is apparently ‘Ozzy’, I’ve been told. It was supposed to be ‘Fozzy’, but Nonon said you’d find that name funnier, for some reason? Just getting it here in the room at all was a humorous story, in and of itself. Gamagōri Ira himself had to drag it up here, since poor Nonon and Mako couldn’t possibly hope to do it on their own! Nonon had it custom made for you by her _own_ personal stuffed animal tailor, I’ll have you know! Also, she has a ‘personal stuffed animal tailor’, which I did not know even existed as an occupation until recently. Oh, and there _were_ a rather large assortment of various chocolate boxes here at some point in time…I’m afraid to report that Mako gets quite upset when she visits you, and the candy samplers were routinely sacrificed in the name of her comfort.”

“She ate them _all_? Aw…still, that’s classic Mako. Oh man, she must be a total wreck by now!”

“I try to pacify her with as much tenacity as I can muster, but she is quite the, _er_ , handful at times…behave, get well, and perhaps we can… _transfer_ you out of here, hmm? Then you can see her again soon for your weekly gaming night, yes?”

“Yeah, you don’t ‘pacify’ Mako so much as ‘witness’ her- _wait_ … _Trans_ - **whaaat?**! Seriously, Sats? Did you just… _go there_?”

“I _did_. Suck it up, sweetheart. You need to allow for at least a little bit of needling, if you ever hope to survive ‘ _The Kiryuin Satsuki Experience’_ , yes?

“- _grrrr_ \- You are _such_ a bitch, sometimes. I swear!”

“Mmm, true. I learned it by watching you, perhaps?”

“You…are you frickin’ serious? This, coming from the ‘ _Queen Bitch of Steel Panties Nation_ ’ herself?”

“Relax! I’m just toying with you, dear heart. We’re _both_ magnificent bitches of the highest caliber! Life has made us that way…and personally, I shall not deny my nature to anyone. You should follow suit…not that I expect any less of you, of course! Woe unto those foolish enough to be our enemies, hmm? However, I _do_ want you to understand that, being such a person…I never intend to inflict true harm or disrespect upon you, Matoi Ryuko. Please believe this and remember it well. I can’t pretend that I am not a difficult person, or that I will ever be anything but that in the future. A leopard cannot change its spots, after all. But I do love you so, and always shall. This horrible incident has only served to remind me of just how very important you are to me…I need to show you and tell you this more often, now more than ever! Even if I should somehow never succeed in actually becoming a better person than I am now? I, Kiryuin Satsuki, will _never_ stop trying for you.”

“Right, then. That settles it. Get over here, you! This big-assed hospital bed’s big enough for the both of us. I need you next to me right now!”

“I…well, I think-“

“Shaddap! I’m the patient here, I make the rules!”

“That makes absolutely no sense whatsoever! The patient doesn’t get to-“

“ _This_ patient is gonna lose _her_ patience! I need you to be here, right next to me! Doctor Matoi is prescribing herself some quality snuggling, and to hell with anyone who says different! Let them take my medical license! It’ll be worth it, just to be next to you again!”

“…oh very well, you win. I could use some of that, myself. I’ve m-missed you so…so very much. Get in bed _slowly_ now, there you go. Okay, now over… carefully, please! You simply aren’t at full strength! Now to get the bed to lie down, where’s the control? There we go, that’s better. Ah, perhaps now I can finally get some real sleep for once? I’ve been _*yawn*_ having a terrible time even…even falling asleep, these days. Been so…so _*yawn*_ jealous, watching you slumber. I know that sounds so silly and inappropriate, but it’s true, please forgive me! Goodness, it’s so warm here next to you, Ryuko-chan! I swear, you must generate excess amounts of heat by way of your immense caloric intake. _Mmmm_ -it’s so nice…to feel you moving, breathing, talking again. Please do _*yawn*_ excuse my rudeness, ‘m jus’ so damned _tired_ …I have so much to talk about, so much I still need to tell…you…my dear heart…I’m…mmm… _mmmm_ -”

“Aw…aaaaand she’s down for the count, everyone! Ding ding, I win! So now I guess it’s _my_ turn to watch over _you_ , right? Ah, you know…someday, Kiryuin Satsuki, I promise. Someday, I’ll be brave enough to admit to your face just how pretty you look when you sleep! Your big ol’ serious brows and permafrown just relax, and you become this…sweet, beautiful delicate creature. Yeah, and mebbe you _won’t_ kill me fer admitting that, too. _-snort-_ Pssht, yeah right, that’ll be the day!   _*yawn*_ Heck, I’m gettin’ all tired jus’ lookin’ at yer cute lil’ mug right now! Shit, now why am _I_ so exhausted, I’ve been sleepin’ fer weeks, right? Boy, I guess gettin’ shot really takes a lot outta ya, even if a bunch of life fibers are there to save the day, huh? Yep, I guess maybe a nap sure feels like a _*yawn*_ really good idea, right about now…I’ll take good care of ya…yer in good…hands, my big ol’…squishy… _softy_ _Satsy_ …”

If Ryuko was just a tad bit more observant during her drowsy confession, she might have noticed the faintest of smiles ghosting over her sister’s otherwise motionless lips. Alas, she was now down for the count as well.

 

 

-Five years later-

 

 

“What have you always wanted to do?”

“I’m afraid I don’t follow.”

“Well, you know…our childhoods and all that. I have a bunch of crap I never got to do, circumstances being what they were…so I figured you must be the same way? I mean, here we are, gettin’ back in touch with the concept of childhood…we need to become experts, right?”

“Mmm, yes. That, and we need to do it right this time.”

“Right! So…?”

“Ah, what have _I_ always wanted to do? Well…no, it’s silly.”

“No, it ain’t! What is it? Is it something we can do with Jun?”

“Well, of course. I once witnessed a most interesting tournament in Brazil, a long time ago. There were these kites, and they were used as cutting weapons against each other in the most interesting display of-“

“Uh…whoa, she’s _not_ doing that, Satsuki. Not on my watch! No more training children for war! _Bad, bad Satsuki!_ _Bad girl!_ ”

“What? Oh heavens, no! Of _course not_ , Ryuko! I just meant that…I’ve never flown a kite before. I was merely explaining to you the first time I saw it done, and the idea stuck with me…to fly so freely, yet to be in complete control of it. I suppose I _have_ flown in the sky, in my own time. We both have, of course! Yet I don’t think we were allotted the time to truly enjoy the experience. Still, there’s something alluring to me in that simple activity. Would that be all right with you?”

“Never flew a kite, huh?”

“No. Many childhood activities were deemed to be ‘frivolous’ and ‘unnecessary’ in the Kiryuin household.”

“Well, good thing ya ain’t a Kiryuin anymore! In the Matoi household, we have _fun_! C’mon, let’s go dig up a kite or three, then! Heeeey…ya know what? I think I saw an eagle-shaped one at the hobby store downtown the other day…you can get that one!”

“Yes, we do have fun, don’t we? Thank you so much for indulging me in my silliness.”

“Nothing silly about that, ya know. Come on, let’s be kids again…with our kid!”

“Please lead on, dear. You are the ‘fun mom’, after all!”

“Aw, come on. You are _so_ much fun!”

“Ryuko…don’t give me ‘that’ look. It’s…inappropriate! There is a time and a place...”

“Oi, Sats?”

“Yes?”

“ _Go fly a kite_.”

 

-

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Sequel to ‘The Art of War’.
> 
> I think I have the opposite of writer’s block. But I suck at typing, and am a perfectionist to boot (not that I can create perfection, mind you), so it takes a while for me to crank these out. Meh. Damned story, just won’t leave me alone, grumble, grumble, etc.. So…maybe two or three more chapters? We shall see…
> 
> Content notes:
> 
> Causality - the principle that everything has a cause.
> 
> Karōshi (death from overwork): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kar%C5%8Dshi
> 
> Kite fighting: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fighter_kite


End file.
